Happy birthday mom!

Mum

There are some Kiwi/non-Filipino things that I don't feel comfortable doing or saying. Like buying and giving greetings cards (I have a suspicion though that card-giving is probably universal); using the words 'mate' (which is similar to like saying 'pare' but 'mate' is applicable to anyone regardless of gender) or 'ta' which is a British-ism for 'thank you'. 

But I like saying 'mum'. We grew up calling our parents mommy and daddy and switched to mother and father when we got older. One would have thought that using 'mom' or 'dad' would have been natural seeing how Americanised Filipino culture is, but I think Kris Aquino put us off using it. It sounded like a pretentious upper middle-class affectation and while it seemed that people thought we were in that social category, the truth was that we never did put ourselves in any. We slummed it out with rest of them and when necessary, played the part better than the best of them. Integrity, and your own self-respect were far more tangibly better things to possess than financial and career success. But mum wouldn't begrudge praise when friends or acquaintances kids achieved either- and would point it out to you. The fact that it didn't take me long to realise that it wasn't meant as a subtle jibe is credit to her perseverance- and commitment to her job as a mother. 

You can only push your child so much but she certainly tries, and still does. And this to me is her most important legacy, something she practices herself to this day even if it sometimes borders on near obsession (like her fervent Catholicism; her championing of her friends; her zealous dieting). 

You have to try, and try, until you literally succeed (a really pointed reminder she dropped on me in middle school when i was flailing with stupid, goddamned mathematics).

And this applies to everything- being a better person; a healthier one; a richer one; a more truthful one; a creative one; a more compassionate one.

Because the day you stop, is the day you fail.

Happy mother's day mum (even if we don't really celebrate it but as Kiwi's are fond of saying, let's give it a go).

The cost of health

....is too much. The problem is neither poverty nor hunger, but food inequality. Everyone expects you to eat healthy but wait until you've finished ringing up your items and see how much damage it has done to your budget. To put it into perspective, the food in the photo above cost me $15; smoked salmon (because I need my Vitamin E, good cholesterol) was $9 and the salad (because I need my finer and my vitamins) was $5. And this was just for one lunch.

Fifteen dollars can get a size 14 dressed chicken, two servings of (fried) chips and a large soda; this is dinner for a family of four. Not the healthiest, but obviously your options are dictated by what you can afford.

Gardin of Eatin Corn Tortilla Chips retails at $7 for a 200 grams- but you have to try it. The blue-black chips have a depth of flavour and texture that screams quality

Who would have known that all sugars are the same calorie wise?

My problem with Muesli is that it's not pleasant nor easy to eat; I feel dental bills coming in a month

Utterly tasteless- and you end up using sugar laden jam to counter the blandness

The problem is that if you end up eating a whole tub (which I did) you cancel out the health benefits

This is $48 bucks; ain't buying this shit

A Matt gallery

Happy birthday Matt!

Winter is coming...and the colour theme is black

I remember my first working winter in New Zealand. I took the train to the city from Henderson and as it sped down the track, I would spy spots of colour in an otherwise wall of black- everyone was in black. It seems apt as Kiwis stubbornly cling to the belief that the only acceptable weather is warm, sunny and summery; anything that is opposite is an anomaly, an outrage like disliking Marmite or betting against the All Blacks.

Some have budged from the winter uniform since then but black, like anything quintessentially Kiwi (most of the current national sports groups have the word 'black' in their names after all), will never go out of style.

Country Road Wool Cable Knit Crew in black; the new MacBook Pro 15-inch (space grey which is almost black in person lol) with Touch Bar & Touch ID; Nike Zoom All Out Low in black/anthracite; John Varvatos Dark Rebel cologne;  Country Road Slim Tapered Black Jean; Kmart shag-carpet in black and silver. 

Happy birthday to me

How you celebrate your birthday shows exactly where your life is at the moment. There was a full decade when it was all about other people; I closed a restaurant once, and a bar just to accommodate everyone I had invited. And these people weren't hangers-on- I was neither rich nor popular- but friends who at that point in my life, were there. And then were gone. I was gone, to a really far country no less. Each time I visit, things change more and more until everything just disappears and I wonder, going through the memories, if the things I remember actually happened.

I had celebrated turning 40 with a quiet dinner at home. I cooked all the dishes I wanted to eat- familiar ones like kare-kare, fried snapper and new favourites like rum and raisin ice-cream for desert- and I was perfectly happy.

This year, it's food again, and family, and new friends and a nagging suspicion that no one's going away just yet.

That road up north

After you've gone past the city of Whangarei, there is nothing much to see in terms of urbanity- just farmlands, forests, dingy road-side cafes. We've been to Paihia before so the whole point of holing up overnight in a motel on the cusp of autumn (though the trees are still stubbornly green) and trying out a much-ballyhooed ribs-dinner was just a welcome break from all that tiresomely tedious urbanity.

But ironically, you do still look for urbanity- a wifi connection, cable and a gourmet ice-cream restaurant. We were looking for seafood but it seems that Kiwi consumers would have nothing to do with a fish unless it arrives on their plate already cleaned and cooked. 

On the way back, we took a side-trip (about 40kms) to a hot-springs area. I can't remember the name of it now as it was in Maori, but when we stepped out of the SUV, Chini shrieked at the bubbling muddy puddles and the stench of sulphur was stronger than Rotorua's. There was a make-shift hut with tarp-covered wooden platforms which looked out over the pools; a series of holes that seemed in their irregular shapes, to have been carved out of the earth by hand. Three to four people could fit in one pool and the instructions were that there was a sequence as to how you transferred from one pool to the next. 

The water was black and we knew without even saying it or putting on that expression on our faces that signified displeasure that there was no way on earth we would be dipping our toes in there. I mean, we could on an adult dare, but the kids would most likely refuse and stay in the car skulking.

We wanted to take the requisite phone photo before we left (it was a sight to see the contrast of white caucasian skin against the black water) but there was no discreet way to take it.

We did another detour, this time to the Tutukaka Coast and on my phone's GPS, the long and winding (literally) road to the destination seemed like an immense effort. But this was expressed only by the kids when they were awake or bothered by one particularly sharp curve.

If I could drive, untethered as I am by any responsibility, I would probably take to these long roads (over perfect surfaces as befitting a first-world country). I remember my moped-riding days that when I was bothered by something or when I couldn't sleep, I would take these slow, comforting rides in the middle of the night, or even when it was raining, just to clear my head.

I probably wouldn't do that sort of thing in the Philippines anymore- and get shot or robbed in the process, but it's a shame that I'm losing out on the opportunity to do it here.

After what seemed like eternity, we arrived at what was called Sandy Bay- a panorama of a rained out beach with angry 2 metre waves, black rocks and blush-pink sand. There was no shade and a motley crowd of locals- lean surfers and portly beach-goers were either changing back to dry clothes or getting ready to hit the surf. We just sat in the car a bit looking out- thinking- until the kids started to whine and Jong had to reluctantly start the engine so we could head back; to home, to urbanity and the comfortingly familiar.

Or the tediously tiresome- I didn't even bother to take a photo.

A few new things I've discovered about myself today

I've started running again, by accident. It was a weekend when everything fell into place; the weather was fine, I finished the laundry, blogged a few things. And I felt fine. So I put on my running shoes, stepped out of the house and did about 3.5kms the first time- the first two kilometres being alternating bursts of brisk walking and sprints. The second day, was about the same distance and while I dropped my pace, I ran all the way. I guess I was distracted by the houses as I ran past wondering who lived in them. Day or night, you never really see the people who lived inside.

The last time I actually ran was sophomore year at university. I took running as a physical education class and we ran around the track in Diliman for the whole semester. For our finals, we went over to the Ateneo and ran around the campus. I've always been realistic when it comes to my physicality and I guess I passed that class even if I can't remember what my final grade was, or what I learned from it. When you're 17, youth affords an invincibility, an imperviousness that unfortunately also applies to life lessons.

So when I got an email for a muscle balance assessment from a local physio I thought, it's never too late to know- and this is what I found out:

1. My right foot is nearly half an inch shorter than my left (8 versus 7.6)
2. I have weak glutes! (aaaarrgggggghhh)
3. Running or even walking, my feet tend to collapse quickly on their arches which explains the quick shin pain and tightness of my outer thighs.
4. I tend to favour my right foot even while standing up
5. My left foot is over-pronated.

Coming back for corrective exercises..

The sound of (my) Sundays

I have a love-hate relationship with Sundays. When my dad was alive, we had the best Sundays; even close to perfect as it could possibly be. The weather then wasn't shitty hot and you woke up with that sense of comfort knowing that the entire day had already been planned for you. The trips, the meals- the food especially! From breakfast to dinner, it was sorted. Poor Nana Iday would be making breakfast and at the same time, prepping for lunch and dinner. 

Who would have thought though that perfection is such an unnatural state? That it takes effort, skill and a largeness of character to pursue and create it? When he passed away, Sundays as we knew it changed irrevocably. It took years before we could re-claim it and shape it in a way that made us happy.

It's no longer those Sundays in our memory, but we take comfort in the fact that unknowingly, dad had given us the power to create our own- for ourselves and for the ones we love.

Some nifty things

Nifty to me means:

1. Affordable
2. Uncomplicated
3. Easy

Pancake Mix
Whip it and fill it up with bananas, blueberries, flaked almonds. The fruits stop me from going over-board with the maple syrup though I should seriously stop having bacon on the side. Fast and easy breakfasts..

Nespresso compatible pods
Going all out on Nespresso can be expensive and besides, they sort of all taste the same after a while. So I like to mix them up with my current favourites  L'Or and Hummingbird organic coffee.

Zara scents
At $25 per bottle, it's a money-saver when you're in between more pricey scents (like saving up for that $350 Tom Ford tobacco-inspired parfum) and need to spritz like every moment, because at that price, why not?

Kindle e-books
I was at Whitcoulls the other day and saw a paperback copy of The Roanoke Girls by Amy Engel- it was a moment that felt like serendipity; off work early on a languid afternoon where reading a good book in bed was just the right thing. Or not- especially when I saw the sticker price, $35. Thank god for e-books! Didn't get the book though, but got this one instead because I'm feeling a little dark.

Fresh, packaged meals you can buy online
More cost-effective when you're not a family of five. The salads particularly are great especially when your repertoire extends to just micro-waving frozen packets. You can just stock up and supplement it with proteins like chicken-breast and pork. This one is a layered sushi-salad with nori, red cabbage, edimame in a ginger-soy-sesame dressing from Freshtogo.co.nz.

Dumbbells
There are days when you can't just be bothered going to the gym. But this doesn't mean binge-watching in bed and munching on chips. A good set of dumbbells (with a total of 40 pounds of weight) and a short but effective circuit-training routine spells the difference between flabby and toned.

Where superheroes come to die

Alternate Universe 1
I am over 6 feet tall, eyes as blue as a summer’s sky and impossibly perfect. I can sit down to eat huge meals of fried pork with mounds of white rice and washed down with real coca-cola. I go to bed at 3am after having binge-watched my favourite shows, half-finished a book and wake up- clear eyed, head buzzing- at 6 and head out to the beach on my bike, for a swim. In the icy cold ocean, I swim with the ease of someone seemingly born in water. I head out further, deeper and let myself sink, face-up towards the surface. Reflexively, my chest pulses, the network of serrations open, letting the water in and I start to relax as the oxygen dissolves into my blood-stream and I can breathe. The glimmering surface starts to fade and my pupils adjust- the darkness around me is no longer empty. I take a last lingering look at the world above, at the twinkling double suns before swiftly pivoting, barreling downwards into the world below.

For someone who has no idea of its comic-book origins (I didn’t until the end of the movie), Logan is real life- in your face, wrinkly, ageing, coughing, saggy, sad, regretful, bitter real life. Something is physically wrong with Wolverine- he is working as a chaffeur in Texas and Professor Charles Xavier is suffering from neurodegenerative disease, confined to bed and taking bootleg meds to keep his massive telepathic powers from getting out of control. The other X-Men are nowhere to be found and no new mutants have been born in the last 25 years.

So when an 11 year old girl appears who later reveals herself to be a man-made, cloned version of Wolverine himself, it’s the beginning of the end; it’s the child seemingly usurping the parent. 

And death is all over this film; gone is the PG-13 filter. Adamantium blades slash across throats, severe limbs, stab through heads underneath, on top. Professor Xavier’s regretful pining of something in the past is more personal. It’s not about the world, or abstract philosophical questions. It’s about personal redemption, and whether he gets it we can’t really tell as another clone of Logan- X-24, unleashed by the shadowy Transigen group catches up with them and stabs Xavier as he lies in bed in a medicated fugue. 

But it's when Logan succumbs to a fatal wound that something catches in our throat. And it's not the sentimentality of the cloned little girl crying out 'daddy' that gets us, but the fact that mortality and death catch up with those that seem impervious to it- at least in this alternate universe, it does.

Old Man Logan is an alternative version of Marvel Comics' popular character Wolverine. This character is an aged Wolverine set in an alternate future universe designated as Earth-807128, where super villains overthrew the super heroes. Originally introduced as a miniseries in the ongoing seriesby writer Mark Millar and artist Steve McNiven, the character became very popular with fans. After the Death of Wolverine, X-23 took the mantle of Wolverine, but Old Man Logan was brought in to serve as an X-Man and featured in his own ongoing series.[1

The (future) architect is in the house

The last of a long list of March birthday celebrants; so I couldn't let the month end without a shout-out post to my god-daughter Toni Dominique (her birthday was 8th March).

I stalked her on the net looking for photos away from my usual source (weiwitch.com) and was surprised to discover how involved she is with her architectural course at the University of the Philippines in Diliman. 

So here are five innovative spaces borne not only out of human creativity and imagination but also more importantly I think, from a genuine love of what you do- so continue loving what you do Tonic and everything will fall into place..X

H2 CAPE HOUSE

Located on the French Island of Corsica, the H2 Cape House uses a low profile and natural materials to blend into its Mediterranean setting. A green roof paired with slats of red cedar cladding infuse with the coast's lush vegetation, also allowing sunlight to filter through the home's central terrace. The expansive single-story design makes way for a number or outdoor areas — including two swimming pools — to enjoy the seaside surroundings, while extensive internal glazing maximize views for the interior. A private beach outlines the exterior, along with a small port for ocean access to the property. 

Photos: Vincent Coste

OBEREGGEN MOUNTAIN HUT

Set next to the Oberholz cable station, the Obereggen Mountain Hut is a modern take on the classic Stube. It's home to a restaurant, and is split into three main sections, each laid out so that the glazing on the end faces a nearby mountain. The hut is also constructed entirely from wood, with spruce used for the structure and interior, larch for the facade, and oak for the furniture. A sunken design ensures that the views aren't spoiled on arrival or as you enjoy your meal.

Photo: Oskar Dariz & Jens Rüssmann / Peter Pichler Architecture

TEXAS BUNKHOUSE

Built as a getaway for a writer/director and his friends and family, this Texas Bunkhouse bends around the trees that dominated its plot, roughly 30 miles from Austin. As the trees dictated the home's shape, so too did they influence its vertically-oriented structure, with the full-length screened porch providing uninhibited views of the surrounding foliage. Inside there are open cots and a kitchen, as well as a single enclosed bedroom, two bathrooms, and an outdoor shower. The building is clad in multi-color stained cedar to blend into the landscape while lending a brick-like randomness, and the house sits on concrete piers above a dry creek bed, just steps from a nearby swimming pool.

Photo: Panton Architect

MIRROR MIRROR ROOF HOUSE

Sitting above the rooftops in The Netherlands, the Mirror Mirror Roof House puts all other tree houses to shame. Like its name implies, the cubed roof extension is clad in a mirrored glass, reflecting the landscape around it and making it almost disappear into the background. The double-height interior is completely sheathed in sheets of natural pinewood, housing an office and a floating steel bedroom. Large openings on every wall not only allow in plenty of sunlight but also provide continuous views of the surround treetops. Not too shabby for a 12-year-old boy.

HIGH HOUSE

Hovering above a Quebec hillside, the High House uses a foundation of stilts to adapt to its snowy terrain. The gabled structure is elevated off the ground to protect the first level from the frigid elements, while also creating a protected outdoor area. Its clean lines are clad in a white concrete paneling and a corrugated steel roof to blend into the winter landscape, but also creates a striking contrast with its green backdrop in the summer months. The raised design also lifts the focus above the surrounding tree line, allowing for views of the Mont Saint Anne from the main living area.

When a president says I'll kill you...

Adele Live 2017: a concert that actually made you feel good about yourself

I'm for nostalgia only when it comes to family. For music- sure, it's a trip listening to those 80s and 90s tunes- but I am hinged (on that rare occasion) to the present. That is why when Madonna came to New Zealand, there wasn't really that attachment anymore to music that felt firmly rooted in the past (Material Girl in the late 80s and Vogueing to Vogue at the University of the Philippines in the 90s). I discovered Adele by accident way before she imploded. And while those sad and forlorn train commutes listening to 'One and Only' are now in the past, I am still hinged to her music (pre-ordered 25 and I NEVER EVER buy music) because:
1. I do love ballads
2. I am always partial to music I can sing (and I can actually sing thank you very much)
3. And while music can be many things to many people, it is to me, something that is personal and relatable. And Adele is relatable.

When she came on and without hesitation, plunged into the downpour, you already felt that you've gotten your money's worth; that this is one person you feel that you actually know. That she actually comes closest to being real is both an enigma and an anomaly in this day and age where people share a lot of things, a lot of which are not even 'real'.

The only bullshit thing about the concert was the stupid Auckland rain- but then I thought, I probably would only be able to experience this once. Adele had said after all, she didn't care about the money. The tour could be her last. That two armies wouldn't be able to coax her to do one more album. That family, happiness and peace of mind, were far more valuable things.

She couldn't have been more right.

Happy birthday to this little one...

Happy birthday Chini Rae!

The girl is now a lady

Happy birthday Ally! xxxxx

What makes you happy

Apparently, today is International Day of Happiness. After having spent the whole weekend working at our annual show thingy, I was exhausted by Sunday but still believed that if I slept early, I would wake up recovered Monday. But I didn't because I watched the latest episode of Greys Anatomy and had to wake up to get a ride with Mary at 6:30am- which I could have cancelled the night previous but didn't.

But that's two things that make me happy- sleep and watching Greys Anatomy.

At the office, my boss looked bleary eyed but refused to admit he was tired from the weekend as well. He gives me that pensive look and asks the one question every boss should ask- 'are you happy?'. And I answer with the truth- 'I am'. 

I get excited for Mondays. I curate what I wear. I don't eat tragic sandwiches for lunch. And if you're happy at work; that's about half the healthy total.

The other half are:
Knowing the kids are safe, healthy and happy too

Shoes

Great food

Memories of home

Rain and cold

LOVE

Friendships

Songs for the birthday boy

Happy birthday Jay!